In a recent interview with Wired, billionaire philanthropist Melinda French Gates made clear she is no friend of hustle culture and nonstop busyness.
“My parents were countercultural. They actually taught us that you needed breaks,” she says. “We took Sundays off as a family, and guess what else? My parents actually taught me the importance of rest, of taking a short nap every day.”
Building quiet, restful moments into your day doesn’t just help you think more clearly and feel better physically, she continues. It also helps you check in with yourself and your values. It is important to “know who you are as a person and to live in that direction and in that lane, even when the world calls you to move in different ways,” she says.
Naps are clearly one (research-backed) way to do that. But in interviews and social media posts throughout the years, French Gates also recommends another way to take a pause from busyness and get back in touch with yourself — The Book of Awakening by poet and cancer survivor Mark Nepo.
The book she reads almost every day
When Wired asked French Gates to name a book she thought everyone should read, she mentioned Nepo’s book. That made me curious and prompted me to dig into what the book is all about and why she is such a huge fan.
Rather than a novel that spins a story of a nonfiction book designed to teach you about a particular subject, The Book of Awakening is a collection of short essays, one for each day of the year. There’s no need to read from cover to cover, you can dip in and out whenever you feel the urge.
Which is apparently just what French Gates does. In a 2018 social media post she explained, “I open The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo almost every day — and years later, I still get something new out of it every time I turn a page.” It was illustrated by a much marked-up page from her personal copy of the book.
A daily read to quiet the mind
Put that together with the latest Wired interview, and it’s clear French Gates has been perusing this particular book for more than seven years and still finding valuable nuggets within. What kind of insights is she discovering there?
“Mark’s writing helps me step back, be still, and center myself — particularly on days that feel especially chaotic, or when I need a moment of quiet,” French Gates continues.
Helping people find enough stillness to remember what truly matters to them and notice the grandeur of the world is just what Nepo’s book promises. As Amazon’s description puts it, this “spiritual daybook is a summons to reclaim aliveness, liberate the self, take each day one at a time, and to savor the beauty offered by life’s unfolding.” It aims to help readers “stay vital and in love with this life, no matter the hardships.”
Psychologists (and Oprah) agree with French Gates
This all might sound a little woo-woo to some hard-charging entrepreneurs. But hard science suggests that taking even just a few minutes out of your day to cultivate a sense of awe in this way can have impressive benefits.
Research by UC Berkeley psychologist Dacher Keltner and others shows awe reduces stress, loneliness, and depression, and nudges us to be kinder and more generous to others. It even seems to have physical benefits, including reduced inflammation.
The idea of taking a quiet moment outside of the hustle and bustle each day to reflect and reconnect with yourself is also endorsed by plenty of other super-achievers besides French Gates. Oprah Winfrey (who also recommended Nepo’s book) always takes a moment to pause and set an intention before every big event in her day.
“I never go downstairs to tape a show. Any kind of media appearance that I don’t have a conversation by myself alone, I need time alone,” she has said.
Again, this isn’t hocus-pocus. Psychologists explain that touching base with our values and intentions primes our mind to pay attention to what really matters to us when things get busy. Just as someone who just bought a Toyota will suddenly notice all the Toyotas on the road, someone who takes a moment to recommit to gratitude is more likely to notice the bright spots in their day.
Read daily for more self-awareness and awe
If taking a quiet moment each day to cultivate awe to quiet your mind and remember your values appeals to you, then French Gates has offered the same, simple advice for years. Pick up a copy of The Book of Awakening and leave it somewhere handy. Naps refresh the mind and body. This book will refresh your spirit, she insists.
—Jessica Stillman
This article originally appeared on Fast Company’s sister publication, Inc.
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