At 10:24 p.m., while brushing his teeth, my husband’s phone pings.
It’s not an emergency. No one is bleeding. No building is on fire. It’s an email that begins with the words, “Just circling back.”
In France, this would be illegal. Or at least deeply frowned upon. Since 2017, French workers at companies with more than 50 employees have had a legally protected right to disconnect. That means, employers can’t expect workers to answer emails or messages after hours. Similar policies exist across Europe, including Spain, Belgium, and Greece.
Meanwhile, in America, we’re circling back at bedtime.
The Country That Turned “Always On” Into a Personality Trait
In theory, Americans love freedom. In practice, we seem to love productivity even more.
Historically, we don’t just work, we identify with our work. We humblebrag about being slammed. We apologize for vacations. We wear burnout like a well-earned Miss America crown. The unspoken rule is clear: If you’re not reachable, you’re not serious.
I’ve interviewed hundreds of working parents over the years, and one thing comes up again and again: It’s not just the workload that is crushing them, it’s the anticipation of it. The constant low-grade anxiety that an email could arrive at any moment. That their boss might “just need one thing.” Silence could be interpreted as laziness.
